Elizabeth (sistinas) wrote,
Elizabeth
sistinas

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bittersweet

The beginning of spring is always a hard time for me, not just because the blooming pollens bury their way into my lungs and set off my asthma, but the first day of spring marks the anniversary of my father's suicide back in 1989.... Somehow its just a bit worse when something like that happens on a particular date of note on the calendar rather than an "ordinary" one and makes it that much harder to try and forget...

Been battling depression of late, very stressed due to finances, things are increasingly tight with federal salaries frozen for a second year in a row while everything else goes up in cost, especially rent, gas, food, insurance.... I've had to be much more careful with spending & cut way back on going out to eat, movies etc. Trying to eat healthier and make stuff from scratch to be cheaper and avoid scary processed food (reports on hi fructose corn syrup and Jamie Oliver's demos on pink slime and chicken nuggets scared the bejeezus outta me). Bought a crock pot and have been making lots of soups and stews. How freakin' domestic of me! With the wonderful new Whole Foods just a couple blocks away there are so many tempting ingredients!

Busy cleaning the closets and boxes digging out old stuff to put on ebay for some spending $, very happy when 20 year old beat up t-shirts fetch lots to collectors! I guess I shouldn't feel so bad about having all those tubs of black T shirts in storage!

Stuff for sale on ebay -http://www.ebay.com/sch/sistinas

My car is making lots of distressing undercarraige noises - possibly struts need replacing? I can't afford to take it in to get looked at though so trying to drive it as little as possible in the meanwhile, starting to take the metro to work instead of driving & thinking of up giving up my parking pass at work so I can go back to their transhare & get free metro fare that would cover my commute.

I've been breaking out the bike I bought on Craigslist (got a great deal on a used Trek 7100!) and trying to get used to this newfangled one with lots of gears that is way more complicated than my old ten speed when I was a kid.

If the car totally craps out I may just sell it cheap or donate to charity and take metro or bike most places & get a zipcar membership for anything else. Thankfully there are some zip cars parked at the metro station which is just a ten minute walk from the apartment. It would also save me $100 a month in gas and $75 in parking costs at my apartment.

Speaking of the apartment, while I may bemoan the cost, I certain will never regret moving there, especially when I see how much the "old neighborhood" in Gaithersburg continues to slide downhill since we left. For shits & giggles I sometimes check the police blotter to see whats been happening on the old block, this is the scariest recent report that happened in the fancy new housing complex across the street from my old place -

Suspected MS-13 gang members charged with raping girl, 17, in Gaithersburg

I always wondered back during the housing bubble who would pay half a million dollars for a townhouse in such a crappy neighborhood (as well as who would be stupid enough to get an interest only loan anyway)....now the painful truth emerges, they were bought by the same people who lived in the crappy neighborhood and couldn't possibly afford them but got suckered into predatory loans they couldn't afford and now are foreclosed....

So I might be poorer but wiser, I'm very grateful that I moved and believing that you do get what you pay for...that place was much cheaper but definitely unsafe! At least I can sleep soundly at night & not worry about being to close to the windows or of somebody breaking in. Instead it is nice and peaceful and I can go down & walk by the pond & see bunnies and ducks and deer. Got a great photo yesterday while walking back from the metro of a huge red tailed hawk who swooped over me and landed in a nearby tree to pose.

Off this afternoon straight from work to see The Hunger Games, looking forward to it, "may the odds be ever in your favor"

Also REALLY psyched to see the Cabin in the Woods - got free tickets to an advance premier downtown on April 2nd, very psyched, especially as cast member Fran Kranz will be there for a Q&A - he played my favorite character on Joss Whedon's show 'Dollhouse', Topher Brink.
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